Slater is on the mic, for perhaps the last time. He is presentting our yearly awards. Oh, the humanity! The rabbi is becoming ever more belligerent!!! He and the milk have just come to blows, only to be separated by Mario and Luigi!!! Exclamation points!!!!!!!
Cooper accepts awards on behalf of both himself and former PR Sammy Franco. God bless Sammy Franco, wherever he is. Probably at home in Terra, watching cartoons.
Plotz and Patchez are loudly applauded for their long, hard...turgid...efforts to put a cock and balls on the football field at every opprotunity.
Management is getting pelted with missiles right now. We've always wanted to see the entire Band rumble against the U$C band or someone, but it looks like we might have to live out a civil war first. Coop and I are retreating to an undisclosed location.
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